Blessed

More tears, more prayers. I was shocked last weekend to find … two pink lines on this cycle’s test! We were stopped for the night in Kentucky, on the way home from our family vacation, and I started yelling so loud that my husband said I was going to wake up the entire hotel. But then he saw why I was so excited.

“Do you see two pink lines too?” That was all I could ask him. We couldn’t say anything else for a few moments – could only hug each other and cry. We eventually prayed together right there, in the hotel bathroom. I wanted to thank God for this, this amazing blessing, even though it still seems unreal.

Worried that perhaps I conjured up a second line (I must have asked DH four times throughout the day if he really saw two lines too), we rushed to get in the car to make it back to Michigan before my RE’s office closed on Saturday afternoon. We made it five minutes before closing. The blood test confirmed it – pregnant with an HCG of 36.85. We called our parents and siblings, and they all cried on the phone with us.

After two years, is this really happening? It was the first cycle after the lap, and we hadn’t let ourselves hope. Now, I’ve had three more blood tests over this last week (even while I was out of state helping my pregnant sister move), and my numbers have more than doubled each time. 

Yesterday, the HCG was up to 1447. To celebrate, my husband and I went to Babies R Us to walk around the entire store and just soak it all in. We finally let ourselves touch the baby blankets, talk about what stroller we want, pick out a frame for the ultrasound photo. We started to dream of what this baby may look like. I want to cry just thinking about it.

Oh God, thank you. Thank you! Please protect this tiny little baby. Help this baby to grow and develop and be the one we’re able to hold as our own in March. This is thrilling, yet God, there are so many others whose hearts are still hurting waiting for this blessing. Please help them feel loved, God. Please give them the babies they long for.